Rich in Fearlessness

CONTEXT

We’ve all heard the phrase, “Fortune favors the bold.”

But when facing a bold move, most of our minds are filled with clutter. Past regrets, future anxieties, present worries. (Spoiler alert: Each of these are just different spellings of the same word: fear.)

Here’s the thing.

Fear is a mile wide, but an inch deep. I love the way Leila Hormozi explains it in this Instagram video. When we look at it from afar, it’s a daunting ocean. But if we just take that first step in? We’ll realize it’s a puddle. We might even laugh, saying “This is what I was so afraid of?”

That’s what we’re doing today. We’re putting our foot in the water to realize it’s only an inch deep, and we can easily walk across it.

Let’s start with the 1 thing that is cluttering up your mind. Perhaps you:

• Know you should leave your job, but you’re afraid of the uncertainty. (Me 👋)
• Need to have a tough conversation, but you’re worried about how the other person will react
• Want to move somewhere new, but you’re worried about starting over
• Think you should end a relationship, but you’re afraid you’ll never meet someone better.

Here’s the best method to shrink those fears (down to their actual size). Put on your rain boots, and step in.

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METHOD

Step 1: Get a pen and paper, or open a blank note on your laptop. Give yourself 20 minutes of uninterrupted time. (Pro tip: Put your phone in another room.)

Step 2: Write down the decision you’re avoiding. Be brutally honest: “What am I most afraid of right now? What’s my biggest worry?”

Step 3: Ok take a breath. This is the part where you step in and find out exactly how deep the water is. Write down the absolute worst case scenario of making the wrong choice. Get extremely specific. If everything goes catastrophically wrong, what would it look like? What would it feel like? What would the permanent impact be?

Step 4: Reality check time. On a scale of 1-10, how likely is that worst case scenario? If it did happen, what could you do to recover? How could you get things back under control? (Chances are, most “permanent” disasters are not in fact permanent. You’re more resourceful than you think.)

Step 5: Flip the script. What if things go right? What’s the best possible outcome? Rate that upside on a scale of 1-10. (Spoiler: It usually outweighs the downside by a lot.)

Step 6: Final question: What is it costing you—financially, emotionally, and physically—to postpone the decision? Yes, there can be downside to action. But there’s also downside to inaction. Calculate the cost of doing nothing. If you make zero changes, where will you be in one year? Five years? (Sometimes the biggest risk is not taking any risk at all.)

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WHY IT WORKS

“We suffer more in our imagination than in reality.” —Seneca

It’s tempting to put off decisions out of fear. We don’t want to have that tough conversation. We don’t want to send that resignation letter. (I’ll be honest. I procrastinated putting in my two weeks’ notice at Google for a while.)

But then I went through this exercise. Worst case? Maybe I’d need another tech job in the future. Best case? I’d land the book deal of my dreams and grow my coaching community to new heights. The cost of not deciding? I'd spend the rest of my years wondering "what if?"

Usually the thing that worries us is the bold move we need to make. As the famous saying goes, “The magic you are looking for is in the work you are avoiding.”

Instead of trying to ignore your worries, give them dedicated space and time. Take a clear look at them. Once they're out of your head and onto a page, you'll be able to see that the downside is not as large (or as likely) as you thought.

And what if it goes right…?

Until next week,

Jade

P.S. I just want to say an enormous, heartfelt thank you to every single person who sent me the kindest notes this weekend and commented on this LinkedIn post with my 7 lessons learned from Google.

My life changed dramatically over the past 2 years. And it’s all thanks to growing my personal brand. To everyone in Archimedes, I’ll be sharing quite a bit about this journey over the next few months.

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